I have had a problem with drinking for a while now. For the last year all I did (pretty much) was sit on the couch and drink. I was at home – with my family – but NOT with my family. I shut down, stopped living for the last year. I hated myself!
My husband (Love Bug) had had enough! He went and talked to my therapist about what he could do to help me. They decided that what I needed was inpatient treatment. Love Bug came home and told me and I was THRILLED!!!! I wanted this sooo much! I wanted to get well!
I entered rehab on May 30, 2014. Scared to death!! Didn’t know what to expect! I had to tell “my story” about 3 times that day. The admission process was like walking through a fire pit! The shame and guilt I felt was incredible. What I had put my family and friends through was unforgivable.
The 30 days in rehab were both heaven and hell. I had to talk about things that about killed me but in doing that, I let the pain out and peace flooded in. I praise God for being there (so thick!) with me through the entire time. I learned so much about myself and what my life could be. I learned that I didn’t have to live that way anymore. I could have a wonderful, sober life.
I made some amazing friends in rehab. We have already been texting and talking about how life is on the outside. They are such a great support for me. I will love them forever along with the CA;s (counselor assistants) from rehab. These people are the HEART of rehab. They were there 24/7 to talk to, cry with, hold on to, and just be my angels! I can not thank these people enough!!
I’ve been going to AA for the past 2 years. I have an amazing support system of friends at my AA home group. They even came to see me at rehab. I will be leaning on them to get me through the happy times and the bad times. I also have the most amazing family. They love me and want the best for me. They are my rock! I came home on June 30. It was very weird to be outside those walls, but I am so happy. At 50, I have been given the gift of a happy, amazing, sober life.
I will be writing on this blog daily – hopefully. I think it will be good to keep me in the moment, in the present. Also I hope that in sharing my good times and trials (staying sober) maybe I can give someone else hope.
Thanks for listening!